No New Year's resolutions but I do have letter writing goals

I don't make New Year's Resolutions because I fall flat on my face within a very short time and I dislike setting myself up for failure. Also, although I understand the appeal of the "It's a chance for a fresh start" concept, the reality is that every day, every minute, every second of my life gives the opportunities for fresh starts.

For several years I pondered why I failed with the shiny, sparkly resolutions thing and finally decided knowing why I failed wasn't necessary. What mattered was that I failed so I set out to create a system for myself to make improvements with regular goal setting and evaluation. It took a few years but I eventually succeeded.

I set realistic goals for myself throughout the year then break down the steps needed to succeed into small bits, giving each bit a general time limit. I'm not too hard on myself in regard to the time because life really can, and does, get in the way. I even allow myself to slide on the minor details once in awhile and I don't punish myself for sliding.

I have several goals for the first quarter of the new year. None of them are impractical, impossible, or lofty. In fact, they're very simple goals. However, each one of them requires discipline and I see that as a good thing. They also require regular time outs to take note of where I stand on them and re-evaluate if needed. Again, I see this as a good thing.

My first letter writing goal is to improve my cursive handwriting. This is an ongoing project for me and it's one reason I write letters. I used to have beautiful handwriting but as I got older and busier and using a computer replaced or minimized time using pens, pencils, and paper my skills slipped. It's the old "use it or lose it" thing and now I try to focus on bettering my handwriting. Corresponding with others helps. I also use a practice sheet I found online.

This is very similar to what I learned in elementary school and it comes fairly easily to me, but I get sloppy. I print several sheets a week and when I have a few minutes to spare I work on them. Those of you who've received correspondence from me are probably very surprised that this is akin to what I was taught. I told you I get sloppy! ;-)

My second letter writing goal is to participate in and successfully complete the A Month of Letters Challenge. I send and receive quite a bit of mail but I want to follow the easier-said-than-done-in-my-mind guidelines of the challenge and I'll need a bit of discipline to do so. Sometimes the last thing I want to do after an eight hour shift on my feet is write a letter. This is where sliding a little will come in handy. I just have to keep from sliding into the abyss of not writing!

My third letter writing goal is to improve the quality of my letter content. Writing interesting letters, especially to strangers, isn't that easy for me. I sometimes feel stumped and find myself writing to just fill the page. I don't like that and I don't think the recipients like it, either. I'm capable of so much more and I know it.

Finally, my fourth letter writing goal is to make new friends. This one really needs no explanation, I think. I just enjoy communicating with people from places and lifestyles different than mine.

So there you have my letter writing goals for the first quarter of 2013. Each of the goals is achievable but will take "sticktoitiveness". I'll most likely chart my progress and share my self-evaluations here. I definitely would like feedback on the goals and on the progress I make or don't make.

Have you set letter writing goals for yourself? If so, what are they?

Enjoy your Monday and make it a wonderful last day of 2012!

Logging mail is a priority on my To Do list

I've never been one to log incoming or outgoing mail but from what I read on blogs, a lot of letter writers keep this practice.

I have quite a bit of mail coming in and going out and think it might be help me stay organized. I worry about dropping the ball and not replying in a timely fashion or, heaven forbid, forgetting to reply all together!

So, in light of that, do you log the letters/mail art you receive? If so, how do you do it? I'd love to know.

This week's To Do List - be available to someone who needs a friend

In addition to my normal to dos of cleaning, laundry, cooking and responding to letters I've received, this week's list has a somewhat unusual item on it.

The holidays, especially Christmas, are difficult for a lot of people, including a young woman I work with whom I'll call Anne. Anne is 22 and lost her father to cancer about a year ago. His battle with the disease was a short but vicious one and she witnessed his suffering and agonizing death. Today, as I walked into the store from my break, I saw her sitting on a low ledge sobbing. She was talking to someone on her cell phone and I slowed a bit as I approached her. I said, "Anne" and she put her phone down. I knelt on the ground in front of her and put my arms around her. She sobbed on my shoulder. I didn't say anything. I just held her while she cried, shaking and clutching me. She managed to get out a few words, "All these families, they're all so happy! I want to be happy again." I thought of a lot of things I could have said and a few I really wanted to say but I stayed silent while she poured out her grief.

Finally, she pulled away and wiped her tears from her face. I reached out and smoothed her hair. "This is a very tough time for you, I know. My dad died several years ago and I still miss him." She nodded and choked back a few more tears and said, "I haven't cried this hard since he died! Why now?" and we talked for a bit about how hard the holidays can be and how they bring up memories, both good and bad, of our departed loved ones. I told her that my grief over losing my father and daughters sometimes sneaks up on me and other times slaps me in the face and either way is horrible but the slapping times are the worst because I don't expect them. They strike me out of nowhere and cause me to practically crumble in grief. She nodded again and looked a little embarrassed. "Will it get better?" she asked and I had to think on that one for a few seconds. "It should." I said. "But we're all different and there's no way to know just how good it will get for you or how long it will take." She looked away for a few seconds then looked back at me and flashed her beautiful smile. "Thanks." I stood up, took my notepad from my pocket, wrote my phone number on the top page, tore it out, and handed it to her. "You're welcome. Call me if you ever want to talk. Or cry." She nodded and I went back into the building and back to work.

I don't know if I handled that situation as well as I could have. A hundred platitudes rattled around in my head and almost came out of my mouth and it took strength not to say them. I wanted to but there's no way for me to know what the future holds for Anne. My crystal ball is broken so I chose to be honest without being harsh and to just be available right then when she needed me.

In a couple of days, I'll surprise Anne with a notecard and letter in her locker. I might even put a goodie or two in the envelope, something that will bring a smile to her face.

This week I'll make myself available to someone who needs a friend. It might be that Anne is the only opportunity for that I'll have this week but knowing what I do about human nature, I think there will be more.

And I'll be waiting.

P.S.

I haven't been able to check my mail in several days because my box keys are with my other keys at the shop that has my vehicle! Oy, the agony of being unable to open my mail boxes and see what surprises are in them is just too much. I should get the keys (and the vehicle) back tonight and will head to the post office to drop off letters and check my box then head home to check that box. The anticipation of what lies ahead is simply delicious!

More recent mail art and this week's to do list update

One of the mail artists I hear from on a regular basis sent me three post card sized pieces recently. I really love the glossiness and colors of these and am considering how best to show them off.

I have some of his other work, along with a few pieces from Wenchkin, set in a tiled mirror frame. I like the arrangement but there's not room in that frame for more so what to do with these three lovelies has been in the forefront of my mind for a few days. I'm sure I'll come up with something.

I posted a few days ago about my "to do" list for this week. It had four items on it. They were: write Mom a letter and tell her all the things she did right, acknowledge a service worker, be the first to say "thank you" and mean it, and write a letter. I'm happy to write that I accomplished those four things and tomorrow will post my list for the coming week. 

This week's To Do List - small acts of kindness

My Live Better America To Do List for this week has 4 things on it; write Mom a letter and tell her all the things she did right, acknowledge a service worker, be the first to say "thank you" and mean it, and write a letter. The first and last items aren't the same thing for me so I'll do both. I'm sure that between work and other activities I'll have opportunities for the remaining two. Not that I don't already do them but this week I'll actively watch for those opportunities and act on them quickly. As a service worker of sorts myself I know how a simple compliment on my job makes the day much better. It really doesn't take a lot to make me smile!

What's on your to do list this week?